Transforming Makeup Talk for a Deeper Self-Worth
Initial Interaction - A Playful Makeup Session
In a captivating TikTok video, Katz can be seen getting ready for work while her 3-year-old daughter, Delilah, engages in the fun of playing with under-eye concealer. Delilah excitedly exclaims, "I do makeup with you!" This innocent exchange sets the stage for a meaningful conversation about makeup. Katz, 33 years old, then poses a thought-provoking question, "And why do we do makeup?" As Delilah is busy blending, Katz answers on her behalf, emphasizing that they do makeup because it's fun and it allows them to look "fancy". The little girl's firm reply of "Yes" showcases the impact of this simple message.This initial interaction highlights the importance of involving children in daily activities and using them as an opportunity to teach valuable lessons. Katz's approach of making makeup a fun and inclusive experience for Delilah sets a positive tone for their future discussions.
Thoughtful Explanation - Beyond Beauty Standards
Katz recalls her own upbringing, where she was constantly exposed to women's magazines that promoted the idea of looking younger and more beautiful through various beauty rituals. These messages had a lasting impact on her, making her realize the importance of breaking free from such narrow beauty standards."Those messages stayed with me for a long time — the notion that you need to change yourself to be successful or attractive," Katz shares with TODAY.com. "But I don't want that for my daughter. She is perfect just the way she is." This realization led Katz to adopt a different approach when it comes to discussing makeup with Delilah. By using the word "fancy" instead of "pretty", she is teaching her daughter that makeup is a choice, a way to enhance one's appearance and have fun, rather than a necessity to fit into a certain mold.
Expert Endorsement - The Power of a One-Word Swap
Parenting and youth development expert Dr. Deborah Gilboa wholeheartedly applauds Katz's powerful one-word swap. According to Gilboa, there has been extensive research showing that girls, especially adolescent girls, often connect comments about their beauty to their self-worth."The difference between 'fancy' and 'pretty' is that 'fancy' denotes a choice," Gilboa explains. "For example, Delilah made a choice to put on makeup because of how it made her feel or what she wanted from it. This helps girls develop a sense of agency and self-expression through makeup, rather than relying solely on external validation." Katz's practice of talking herself up while applying makeup in front of Delilah further reinforces this message. She wants her daughter to know that beauty is not about conforming to certain standards but about feeling good about oneself.